Ridiculous Rant: No More Hollywood Reboots!

My sweet friend Jack just told me that his uncle just got a gig in Hollywood. Very cool that Jack's uncle is John Terry, who played Jack's father, Christian Shepard, on LOST.  Not so cool that yet antoher one of my childhood treasures is being rebooted and hooched up.  Apparently, he's going to be on the new and 'improved', Charlie's Angels.  Sigh.  Happy for Jack's uncle, but this Hollywood trend of recycling classic television and movies makes me so sad.

 

 

When I was a kid, I watched the original series - first with Farrah, then with Cheryl Ladd and then with Shelly Hack.  By the time they cast that Tanya chick, I was over it.  I loved that stupid show.  Angie, Heather, Elizabeth and I played pretend Charlie's Angels (we were in elementary school at the time) at the football field/track at the North Campus over and over.  When it was three of us it was all good and the only fight was who got stuck being Sabrina.  When it was all four of us, it got ugly because one of us had to be Bosley.  Our mission was always the same:  we were sent to Dallas to infiltrate the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders organization to find a mystery killer!!  Dun dun duuuuuun!  I think that might have been an acutal episode but I could be wrong.  I have such a vivid memory of the Christmas I got all three Charlie's Angels dolls from Santa.  I couldn't wait to show the girls!  Of course it was also the year I caught my mom playing Santa and putting said dolls in front of the tree.  But I digress...

I'm such a purist when it comes to my pop culture and while I wish Jack's uncle well and loads of good juju for this project, I have to admit that I'm always so peeved by Hollywood pilfering and pillaging through my childhood with these kind of revamps. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory with Gene Wilder was genius and I pretend that Tim Burton's Willy Wonka doesn't exist.  The A-Team was a television show in the 80's with Mr. T, not a flashy action movie with Bradley Cooper, Jessica Biel and Liam Neeson.  Jessica Simpson is no Daisy Duke, Chrisopher Reeve IS Superman, Alice in Wonderland is a Disney cartoon, True Grit starred John Wayne, not Jeff Bridges, and Star Wars is a trilogy.  I can't really complain about what happened with Land of the Lost because I boycotted it and evidently so did everyone else in the free world, and it tanked. I worry what will happen with WonderWoman and a film version of Dallas starring John Travolta as J.R. Ewing.  I could go on and on.  I'm waiting for the day they cross the proverbial line with me and try to retool The Six Million Dollar Man, The Bionic Woman or God forbid, Dynasty.   It's coming...you mark my words.